上周的都柏林骚乱伤透了我这个都柏林移民的心。以保护城市和人民不受外来移民侵害为名，城市内部街道被焚烧和洗劫，这让人难以忍受。感觉有些人非常憎恨移民，他们宁愿摧毁首都，也不愿平等看待我们，让我们和平相处。
周五早上，我一觉醒来，就看到了各种移民群聊里的大量信息。许多人试图建立彼此的勇气和希望，我们的家乡城市的街道是安全的，我们走在。在强加集体责任和惩罚的情况下，很难用同情来建立希望。
燃烧的汽车、公共汽车和破碎的窗户似乎在传递一个信息:希望在都柏林的移民社区灌输恐惧。我们收到了你的信息，就像我们以前收到你所有的信息一样。周四晚上的事件是生活在爱尔兰的大多数移民日常经历的一个放大例子。在我的移民生活中，有很多故事在我心中烙下了伤疤，就像都柏林街头的骚乱一样。
骚乱的目的是让移民对一个人的行为承担集体责任。问任何一个移民，他们都会告诉你他们曾经为其他人的行为集体负责的经历。我的一个故事发生在我在当地一家商店的收银台工作的时候。
一天，一位老顾客走进这家店，并没有购物的意图。他在报纸上读到一篇关于波兰人做了一些他不喜欢的事情的报道，他决定让我也承担责任。
我知道还会有其他时候，我们不得不代表其他我们甚至不认识的移民回应道歉的要求。你能想象，如果你是一个生活在国外的爱尔兰人(我们知道有很多这样的人)，你会被要求解释所有爱尔兰男人和女人的可怕罪行登上头条吗?你会有什么感觉?这毫无意义。
在暴徒眼中，我们都是移民，和他们占据着同样的空间，这是有罪的。这让我想起有一次，我和我的室友们因为在我们的后花园说话而被我们的爱尔兰邻居不断骚扰。有一天，我们请她告诉我们真正的问题是什么，因为两个人说话很难被认为是令人不安的噪音。她说，虽然她承认我们的声音不是太大，但她应该安静地休息，因为她有工作，而我们没有。当时我打两份工，但我仍然无法逃脱公众对我的有害描述，那就是我是一个吃福利海绵的移民。那天我们得到的信息是，在邻居的眼中，我们是移民，她不得不和我们共用一个空间，这让她很生气。
就在上周，在一个移民群聊中，我们为一名移民妇女提供情感支持和建议，她因为在街上走路说母语而被扔石头。她也是一次反移民集会的受害者。
都柏林骚乱是为了提醒我们，我们永远不会感到满足和安全。作为一名移民意味着你的生活永远处于警惕状态，因为即使是像说母语这样正常的事情也可能给你带来暴力。
In the hours following the violent eruption in the heart of Dublin, Irish people rushed to put public statements out to distance themselves from what happened. I cannot read those words without thinking ‘Haven’t we told you this is going to happen?’. Each of the racist incidents that I responded to when working at the Immigrant Council of Ireland was a story of a migrant experiencing a personal anti-migrant riot that burned down their soul and heart.
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Who are you talking to in those statements, and who are you talking about? It is so easy to point a finger at the far-right leaders and the despair of people struggling with destitution. It is so easy to distance yourself from the events that were a burst of long-time brewing hate. The ’not in our name’ slogans offer absolution to people who sip their morning coffee while reading your op-eds thinking racism is a marginal issue in Ireland.
It is so easy to say, ‘It’s not us.’ But is that strictly true? Is resentment of immigrants just a little more endemic than you care to admit? The woman who told me to keep quiet when sitting in my own back garden is a public servant. The man who demanded my apology for being a migrant is a respected member of the local community. The migrants who are seeking help from anti-racism services are victimised by nurses, teachers, neighbours, journalists, work colleagues, lawyers, Gardaí, politicians, civil servants and other people usually not associated with far-right circles.
Genuine inclusion means platforming the voices of immigrants. Take public and media discussions, for instance: If you take up the entire space that should be shared by all, then it is you who perpetuates the unwelcoming environment. It is you if you are fixating on the nationality of any person accused or convicted of a crime that is not Irish. It is you when you are only interested in the stories of migrant victimhood, sidelining stories of our personhood and leadership. It is you who is controlling the public narrative.
The clean-up after the riots will soon remove the signs of violence from Dublin streets. But the scars will remain in people’s souls. Migrants will keep living our lives in a constant state of alert waiting for another personal anti-migrant riot to launch. Meantime, I will continue walking the streets of Dublin as a proud immigrant Dubliner claiming my right to keep calling it home.
Teresa Buczkowska is a Polish-Irish migrant rights campaigner. She spent 10 years working at the Immigrant Council of Ireland.
